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How to Have a Happy Marriage
So what do you do when your wife will not? You do-you
do yourself a favor-you fulfill your role. Love your wife!
Women, God designed you to function
in
a role that
produces happiness. When God made the woman he said:
"It
is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a
helper comparable
to
him" (Gen. 2:18). God created your
mind to be responsive
to
your husband,
to
willingly surrender
your
self
to him (Eph. 5:22).
Now that is not easy for you
to
do, especially
if
your
husband is not a loving leader. But the beauty of God's way
is that your happiness depends on what you do.
If
you fulfill
your role in love
to
your husband-helping him, responding
positively to him, submitting and surrendering
to
him, you
will make yourself very happy.
Accept Each Other
You could be making your own self frustrated and un–
happy. How? By trying to make your mate over into your
image, and that is impossible!
A long time ago (even before you married), you formed
a fanciful idea about what you wanted your mate to be like.
Maybe you still have expectations that your mate will some–
day fulfill your dreams. Forget it-it
will
not happen! Your
unrealistic expectations will only produce frustrations in your
marriage.
Expecting your mate
to
be what you want is selfishness,
and selfishness always leads to unhappiness. Think about
this: You are probably not what your mate always dreamed
of either. So stop putting this unnecessary pressure on your–
self or on your mate.
Accept your mate the way he-or she-is, the good and
the bad. How do you do that?
Accept your mate by concentrating on the good points.
There is something of quality about everybody. You were able
to see those good points before you married. Well, they are
still there. All you have to do is look beyond yourself and you
will see them.
Actively praise your mate for the good points. Build your
mate up in the eyes of others, and he or she
will
grow in
esteem in your own eyes. This kind of affirmative action